How to block feelings and emotions. Psychological defense mechanisms

What is Mnushi?

Mnushi - (Meditative Neirorelaxation Unique Somatic Healing Interaction) - the author's name of the practice with-tactile neurorelaxation in clothes, as well as group classes using this technique.

Russia, Germany, Belgium, Israel, England, France, Poland, Ukraine, Belarus, Canada, Scotland, USA, Egypt, Thailand, UAE, Japan - this is an incomplete list of countries that already have their own Mnushi practitioners.

Mnushi is tactile communication from a special state and attunement, which necessarily involves psycho-emotional feedback.
Sometimes it looks like a passive physical training: stretch your shoulders, crumple your palm, back - the word "crush", "crush" and formed the basis of this word, which became the brand of the school.
Mnushi are able to return a person to a harmonious resource state and mood in minutes.

The word Mnushi has its own talisman (Mnush snail), and has gained such popularity that it is often used as an adjective.
For example: “mushnoe” means especially kind, attentive, sensitive, delicate: people, hands, smiles, atmosphere.

Mnushi is not so much the touch itself, but a special approach to the session, which can do wonders for your mind and body in a very short time.

It can be described as a deep rest through the presence and help of a partner nearby - both conducting and receiving, which in itself is wonderful.

Mnushi involve that area of ​​human relationships, which is little manifested in physical education, gymnastics, yoga: mutual assistance, mutual assistance, involving another person in the life-giving healing process.

What is neurorelaxation?

Neurorelaxation is a soft bodily practice of psycho-emotional correction using social (supporting, soothing, stroking) touches from a state of attention and acceptance, and slow stroking that stimulates s-tactile (social) receptors. nervous system harmonizing emotionality and physicality.

Neurorelaxation has a calming effect on the most basic systems brain (hormonal - limbic and reptilian), and returns a person to identification with his body, creates new neural connections.

Neurorelaxation can be tactile, energy, oil, and with the help of various objects.

In addition, it is not only pleasant and incomparable presence in the moment, a deep rest for a reboot of consciousness, but also a reminder of the language of human communication - through touch.

You can relieve fatigue, stress, irritation, depression in just minutes, but that's not all. Neurorelaxation is able to return beauty, health, harmony, closeness to relatives, and ... to you.

We would like the practice of neurorelaxation to become as widespread and enjoyable daily leisure
in families, like a joint dinner or talking about how the day went. So that husband and wife, parents and children, friends do not shy away from tactile contact and more often express care and love each other with healing attention and skillful methods of neurorelaxation.

Our body is incredibly smart: give it a rest, and it will fix itself from any ailments. Our Body itself recognizes what is harmful to us and what is useful. Having rested from the "noise of the head", we gain the ability to think clearly and clearly, we begin to look at the vanity of life in a different way.
It's very easy to learn this!

The sincere desire of our school is to give you useful skills in the shortest possible time so that you can start practicing as quickly as possible and in the process comprehend the details and subtleties of mastery necessary for everyone who has a body.

Why in gloves?

For better glide on clothing or fabric. All neurorelaxation practices (except oil work) are carried out through clothing. But on exposed areas of the skin (arms, neck), it is better to avoid direct contact with the partner. So the vacationer is better focused on his own feelings.

How to become a relaxologist?

Unfreezing feelings.

When a person has learned not to react to trauma: what does it cost him?

If in childhood the child had a hard time, and for some reason there was no person nearby who would help to survive these difficulties, sharing the feelings and emotions of the child, explaining what is happening and giving his protection and comfort, the child is forced to block those feelings in himself, to survive who do not yet have resources.

This is how the notorious "freeze" occurs - a complete lack of reaction in traumatic circumstances. Blocking the experience of feelings is not difficult at all, each of us has ever done it: it is enough to tighten those muscles that are associated with their expression. For example, clench your teeth and don't cry!

Sensory blocking mechanism.

Everyone knows that grief is expressed in tears. Also, everyone knows what needs to be done in order not to cry: you need to squeeze your teeth tighter, tighten your muscles s around the eyes, and breathe as little deeply as possible. The shallower the breath, the weaker the access to anyfeelings in general complete cessation of breathing, obviously, will lead to the fact that the person will soon be nothingfeel. For only the dead feel nothing at all. However, confrontation with intolerable feelings often causes difficulties, and even temporary cessation of breathing: they say about it: “I took my breath away from despair / fear / horror / etc.”

In fact, such tension is designed to protect a person from emotions and feelings that he (for some reason and often unconsciously) considers unbearable or unacceptable for himself. These feelings often remain unnamed and unrecognized, and, of course, always - unexperienced, which is why they seem to be preserved in the body. But that's not all: those areas of the body that were tense in order to prevent feelings from escaping, also lose subtle sensitivity, become unable to experience pleasure.

The mechanism for this is simple. Try to clench your hand into a fist and run it over the other hand. Pay attention to the sensations in the clenched hand, describe them for yourself and remember. Was there any pleasure in it? Now open your fist, relax your hand, make it soft - and run it over the same place. Compare feelings. Which one has more fun?

The emergence of bodily blocks

If an adult person blocks the experience of feelings once, then, probably, this will not leave any trace on his appearance. The human psyche is capable of self-healing, and even if he consciously does nothing to experience a blocked feeling, there are still dreams, they help to process daytime impressions. But if you do this from childhood, over and over again, if some of the stresses turn out to be familiar to the psyche ... then in adulthood it can be seen literally with the naked eye. Habitually tense jaws on the cheekbones - this is the price for the fact that "boys do not cry." The habitually tense shoulders, the neck drawn into them is an attempt to hide from oneself and not feel one's fear. A tight stomach and locked hips are the price you pay for not feeling sexually aroused. Well, and so on.

Most often, such bodily blocks arise even in childhood, when the child’s conscious possibilities for experiencing feelings are still weak: when parents did not come to the rescue, but you cannot cope on your own, “preserving” a dangerous feeling until better times looks like a very reasonable strategy. True, this affects the development of the body, the so-called “muscle shell” appears, which habitually protects from certain feelings, well, yes, we are talking about survival here: better in a shell, but alive.

Fortunately, unlike the body type, which cannot be changed (and it is not necessary, these are your strengths! You need to use and be proud of them) - you can get rid of this muscular shell, restore sensitivity to your own body. This road is not always easy, but it will be mastered by the walking one.

Exploring our own body

This exercise is best done in the shower, for example, where you can explore your entire body without interference. Turn on warm pleasant water, and, directing it to different parts of your body, explore all the richness of their sensations. By doing this, you can speak kindly to the area under study: "I'm glad to see you, my right shoulder blade, hello!" - it is not so important what exactly you say, but the intention. It is necessary to ensure the benevolence of self-examination, so that it takes place in an atmosphere of benevolent attention, and not a malicious inspector's check.

Notice everything that happens when you examine any area: is there any sensitivity in it at all? You will notice that in different areas the sensitivity is different: somewhere every drop of water is felt, and somewhere only the general pressure or nothing at all is felt. Notice what and how you specifically feel: only the jets of the soul, or, perhaps, inner pain, tension? How do sensations progress? Perhaps there is a desire to make some kind of movement? What emotions do you experience as you explore different areas? Somewhere there will be pure uncomplicated joy of recognizing your body, and somewhere you may feel irritation, sadness or even fear. Perhaps, when examining some areas, memories will come up, any images will come to mind - all this (sensations, movements, emotions and memories / images) can be recorded upon exiting the shower, create a map of your body.

Why are these body blocks dangerous? Because they are the very mechanism that can ultimately lead to psychosomatic disorders. Not in a month, and not even in a year ... But if year after year you force yourself not to feel and not to react, then sooner or later persistence will be rewarded.

But this is not an award worth fighting for.

Translated from English, the concept "psychological protection" means a system of regulatory mechanisms in the psyche, which are aimed at eliminating or minimizing negative, traumatic experiences associated with internal or external conflicts, states of anxiety and discomfort.

When does such a need arise? Scientists prove that psychological defense as a reaction occurs when there is a real or imaginary threat to the integrity of the individual, her identity or self-esteem. Ultimately, psychological protection is aimed at maintaining the stability of the self-esteem of the individual, his image of the Self and the image of the world, which is achieved:

Elimination of sources of conflict experiences from consciousness;

Transformation of experiences in such a way as to prevent the emergence of conflict;

The emergence of specific forms of response, behavior that reduce the severity of experiences of threat or intrapersonal conflict.

Ancestor of the study psychological protection is Z. Freud, who considered it as a form of conflict resolution between unconscious drives and internalized social demands and prohibitions. His daughter, Anna Freud, saw in the mechanisms of psychological defense and ways to resolve external conflicts, ways to adapt to the social environment. According to A. Freud, psychological defense mechanisms are the product of individual experience and learning. Thus, psychological defense was considered as a process of perception and transformation of a threatening or conflictogenic object. On this basis, about 20 types of psychological defense mechanisms have been described. The main ones are:

- Crowding out- elimination from consciousness of unacceptable inclinations and experiences;

- jet formation(inversion) - transformation in the mind of the emotional attitude to the object to the exact opposite;

- regression- return to more primitive forms of behavior and thinking;

- identification - unconscious assimilation of a threatening object;

- rationalization - a rational explanation by a person of his desires and actions, the true causes of which are rooted in irrational socially or personally unacceptable inclinations;

- sublimation - transformation of the energy of sexual attraction into socially acceptable forms of activity;

- projection - attributing to other people their own repressed motives, experiences and character traits;

- insulation - blocking negative emotions, repression from the consciousness of connections between emotional experiences and their source.

Psychological protection cannot be unambiguously considered as a useful or harmful phenomenon. It allows you to achieve a more or less stable state of the individual against the background of a destabilizing situation, traumatic experiences and contributes to successful adaptation to these conditions. At the same time, psychological protection does not allow a person to actively influence the cause, the source of the destabilizing situation. In this sense, an alternative to psychological protection can be either real intervention in the situation and its transformation. Either, or self-change, adaptation to the situation due to the transformation of the personality itself. The useful, adaptive effect of psychological defense is more pronounced when the scale of the conflict that threatens the integrity of the individual is relatively small. Exploring this aspect of psychological defense, D.A. Leontiev argues that in case of a significant conflict that requires the elimination of its causes, psychological defense plays a rather negative role, obscuring and reducing its emotional intensity and significance for the individual. Consequently, psychological protection has a limited, auxiliary role at certain stages. conflict situations but resolves conflict and does not transform personality.

- Only the dead have no problems ...

(c) my grandmother

- Strange ... * there is, but there is no such word

As children, we were told: “Don't cry. Do not pout. What did you shout? Are you angry? Badly! It's all bad! Good kids don't behave like that."And we obeyed our parents, we believed them. We wanted to be good kids because: “Oh, how kind you are! How we love you! We really, really wanted to be loved, we really needed their love.

We dutifully followed their instructions. We firmly learned that good feelings are good, we are loved and praised for it. And the bad ones... Bad. But where to put this "bad"? If it is in us and constantly climbs out?

And we diligently plugged and shoved our feelings back, stuffed, caulked, closed, and continued to be good. We didn’t cry out grief and pain when our body demanded it. When it was painful and embarrassing.

We learned that our outburst of anger upsets mom, mom is called to school, scolded, scolded, and she starts to cry. We are absolutely loving children, and we could not let the loved one cry because of us.

We tolerated anger, we held back anger. We endured the pain, we kept the pain to ourselves. We felt resentment, but we did not show it to anyone, we hid the resentment deep inside.

We learned that our feelings are bad. And they can't be shown. Nobody likes them and nobody needs them. They are scolded for them and they stop loving for them. And we, with our feelings, alas, become unnecessary.

Such as we are - are not needed.Yes. There is no word, but there is oops ...
But let me ask you. What distinguishes the living from the dead? Distinguishes living from non-living?

Right! The ability to feel. Feel the full gamut of your sensations, emotions and feelings.

Feel your feelings.

Forgive our parents, their parents also wandered in the passions of their feelings and did not know how to deal with them. And allow ourselves to be alive.

so

I'm alive? - Yes.
Am I entitled to feel? - Yes.
I have the right to feel the whole gamut of feelings that is inherent in me by nature? - Yes.

Were my parents forbidding me to express my feelings wrong? - Yes.
Are the parents alive? - Yes.
Are parents allowed to make mistakes? - Yes.
There is no division into bad or good feelings? - Yes.
Is there inappropriateness and inability to express your feelings? - Yes.
Is it in my power to learn to recognize, open and heal feelings? - Yes. Yes. Yes.

Spend enough and required amount time (this is one of the manifestations of love and care for oneself).

Unfreeze, unblock your senses. You can finally acknowledge yourself alive.

I am alive and have the right to feel.

I feel that is how nature made me.

How can you reject what was intended and given?

Start with the worst feeling, like being angry or angry. Start with what you dislike the most about yourself. Cowardice? Fear? Resentment?

Heal this feelingsimply recognizingthat you have it. This is 90% healing. Just admit that you have this feeling. And you are not bad, not ugly when you are angry or afraid. You are just alive and feeling.

Imagine feeling as a separate entity that lives in you. By acknowledging, you show respect for a part of yourself and you let the feeling tell you what it wants, what it calls for, what it keeps you from, and what it wants to communicate.

The text is something like this, but you can make a personal appeal to your rejected feeling:

My anger. You are in me. I recognize you and you are my feeling! My feeling of anger. Well, hello, dear. I'm sorry that I shut you in for so long, not recognizing you as a part of me. The part of me that the creator put into me. That which was always inherent in nature, but was rejected by me. My anger, you are and have the right to be, because. I'm alive. Come to me, tell me what you want to tell me, tell me. Why are you to me and how can I be in harmony with you?

Go through all your feelings. Listen to what they tell you. What they always wanted to tell you. You will have insights (write them down in detail and this will be an additional help to your healing) when one or anotherthe feeling was forbidden to you or under the influence of circumstances you suppressed and stopped it in yourself. When and under what circumstances did you find out that you need to lock it up in yourself and not pay attention to it.

***

By the way, do you know what causes alcohol addiction? One of the main reasons? This is a lack of internal strength to survive this or that emotion or range of feelings. Feelings and emotions absorb and capture a person so much that it is easier to suppress and block them in oneself than to live, feel, express, realize and draw the right conclusions.